Guys, Don’t (Dis)miss Valentine’s Day!

Here’s the scenario, fellas: It’s February, and Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. You’re tired of the commercial push for flowers, jewelry, and a fancy dinner for your loved one. You scoff at what the holiday has become and refuse to participate. When you tell your lady you just want to treat Valentine’s Day like any other day (since you already know you love each other) she agrees that you don’t have to do anything. You made a simple statement, you got a straight answer, case closed.

Nope. You still need to do something for her for Valentine’s Day.

Confusing, right? You thought she said it was cool, that you don’t need to get her anything or do anything special. Sorry, that was just her being nice and agreeable. Most likely she is hoping that your grouchiness is just a charade, so that when you do something special on Valentine’s Day for her it will be a surprise by contrast. This holiday might not have a special meaning to you, but I guarantee that it holds some meaning for her. For little girls, Valentine’s Day is  all about the excitement of giving and receiving Valentine’s cards. As teenagers, the focus is on crushes and whether boys will profess their adoration on this special day. As grown-ups, working in an office where other women are receiving bouquets of flowers at their desks, women wonder if their guy will make the effort too.

Naysayers of Valentine’s Day, you are completely right that the holiday has gotten out of hand, but only if you believe what all the advertising it telling you – BUY this, GIVE that, SPEND this or she won’t know you love her. It doesn’t have to be like that. It can be about showing your love and making her feel special. You might even disagree with the fact that you feel forced to do these special things on a very specific day of the year. Who cares? If you’re being sweet the other 364 days of the year, what’s one more day?

Doing something special doesn’t mean spending big bucks. All it involves is being thoughtful and caring in making this day different from every other. Is there a movie she always wants to rent, but you pass on it because it’s what you consider a chick flick? Is there a jewelry store in your neighborhood where she always stops to gaze in the window? Maybe there’s a recipe she emailed you in the past, with a note about how delicious it looks? Perhaps you work long hours, and you know all she really wants is to cuddle up on the couch with you for a few hours without the beeping of cell phones and email?

Skeptics of Valentine’s Day might also feel it’s unfair that society has put so much of the responsibility of present giving or romantic planning on the guy. Guys shouldn’t fall into the trap of that mindset. Making someone else feel special is completely worth it. It grows the bond between you and your loved one, and you will reap the benefits in the immediate as well as in the future.

Now, if you haven’t already, go think up something sweet that will make her smile!

Guys, do you always make sure to do something for her on Valentine’s Day? Have you ever skipped out on the holiday? Ladies, do you agree that it’s important to celebrate the day? What was the best thing a guy ever did for you on Valentine’s Day?

Card image found here.

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The Holiday Proposal

Guys, it’s hard enough to decide it’s time to propose, let alone figure out what ring to present her with at that special moment. But there’s also the question of… When? In honor of Valentine’s Day, I wanted to discuss The Holiday Proposal.

There are 365 days a year when you can propose (heck, there’s even an extra 366th day during a Leap Year), so which day should you choose? Some people propose on a holiday, such as Christmas, New Years, Valentine’s Day, or even Independence Day (built-in fireworks!). Is that the best way to go for you? Is that what she really wants? Here are some things to consider:

  • Is this holiday something special to her? If your girlfriend has always said New Years is silly, or Valentine’s Day is just a holiday fueled by companies trying to sell chocolate and flowers, it might not be the best day for you to propose.
  • How important is it that you remember the date you proposed? Usually couples celebrate the day of their first date, or of their marriage, so celebrating the date of the proposal each year isn’t all that important. But, it might give an extra oomph to the holiday each year when you are able to reminisce about the year you proposed.
  • Will it make for a good story? Proposing to the woman you love is a momentous occassion, and you want to make it special for her. Just remember to keep that sentiment alive when proposing on a holiday. Propose with the same planning and detail as you would on any other day, rather than hoping that just the fact that it happened on a holiday will be enough. After being proposed to, women love to be able to tell their friends all the unique details of their romantic proposal.
  • Is there a chance one of her friends will get proposed to on this holiday? If you are friends with her friends (or their boyfriends), try and see if you can find out whether any of the other guys in the group are planning to propose on that day. While we girls love to be supportive of our friends when they get engaged, we might not want to share to spotlight when it comes to announcing our special news.
  • Is she hoping you will propose soon? Here’s a little secret guys — if you and your girlfriend have talked about marriage, and you can tell that she has been hoping you will surprise her with a ring soon, then every time a holiday comes around she is thinking you might propose. We know that holidays are a key time for people to get engaged, and so we wonder if it just might be the day we get proposed to as well.

In the end, you know your girlfriend and what she likes. If you think there are some things from the list above that might mean she won’t enjoy a holiday proposal, then hold off for another day. Heck, propose on the day before a holiday! She’ll never expect that!

What do you think, Ladies? Would you want to be proposed to on a holiday?

Candy hearts image found here.

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